When your heart’s been broken a couple of times, you understand the resistance that people have towards ever falling in love again. I get people’s anxiety now. Back when I hadn’t been broken up with and heartbreak was a vague thing I identified with in Celine Dion songs. But after my heart shattered, it was like whatever blinds covered my eyes fell too.

I would not want to go through heartbreak again. Sure, I prefer emotional pain to physical, and I’ve definitely had shares of both. Which is also why I now understand why people come to church for one reason – men.

Some women come to church at a time in their lives when they feel like all the men they meet in the club/bar/work are useless. I don’t know what it is about the women in this band, except for I think they’re exhausted by a certain breed of man and are trying to switch hunting grounds (hunting is a strong word, but there is no judgment there). If a man brings you to church and you meet the main man in the process, is it such a bad thing? End justifies the means kind of scenario? And you know what they say – go to places you like so you can meet like-minded people. But why aren’t there people for both places? Anyway. That’s a whole other discussion. This, I get. You want companionship so you refine your search LOL. I’ve always thought that love should be more strategic than feelings. How is it that people plan their whole lives and then leave who they’re sharing this life with to chance?

Then there’s the other group of women who are so splintered by their interactions with the opposite sex that they basically replace their boyfriends and horrific exes with Jesus. (I don’t know if you guys have seen the My Boyfriend is Jesus Brigade on social media?)

This, I don’t get. Jesus can’t be a boyfriend – or can he? I mean, unless you’re a nun, you technically can’t marry Jesus. You can’t cuddle with Jesus. Jesus can fulfill your spiritual needs, but not emotional. Yeah, if you’re into the church, he can give you the ‘strength to be single’ or the patience to wait until things change, but I don’t get why people think that that can be replaced. It’s like how I don’t think your friends can be replaced by your partner. They’re each giving you things that the other side can’t. They aren’t interchangeable.

But also, if you’re done with men, why would you go to (White) Jesus?