My friend is a successful woman, which basically means she makes enough moolah to be in 2 chamas and keep her parents happy enough to not let them start questioning why they paid for her Masters. She also has a deadbeat boyfriend who she’s been with for a year and a half. He looks like he’s here to stay…and couch potato, till getting up to get the remote do them part.

Before she got into this relationship, she introduced this manboy – sorry, boy – to her mom. Her mother hated him on sight. Granted, there was an ethnic influence in the general feeling of dislike, but also, she could smell the Eau de Jobless on him soon as he walked through the door. Unfortunately, and typically, her daughter chose to ignore her mother.

Now, everybody knows that mothers have a sixth sense about all kinds of things. They can tell when **’s about to hit the fan. It’s terrible, really, because knowing this, we (read I) go out to do things and deliberately prove them wrong, which as we (read I) all know, makes us look even more brainless than how we looked at the start. Which was pretty brainless. The thing is, we lie to ourselves that we know better. And yeah, so-and-so’s mom DID know better, but so-and-so was a half wit. I’m much smarter. (you probably aren’t) I wonder if that’s what my friend was thinking? Either way, her mom was right. He IS a douche, and preeeetty unproductive. Moms, about a hundred billion trillion…kajillion…zillion. Kids, like, 12. (This scorecard is marked from the beginning of time)

I wonder if it’s possible to be smarter than our parents? Because let’s be honest, we (read I) all (I again) really wish we were. For ONCE, can I just be right about this job/boyfriend/car/religion/restaurant/apartment…the list continues. You know. The one that makes you look stupid. And then, they keep PROVING it. What IS it with this old age/wisdom thing? Are they, like, scared of being mutually exclusive? Sheesh.

My friend is also an atheist. The quickest way to break an African Christian mother’s heart (most of them, anyway) is to tell them you do not subscribe to the religion of their ancestors, that in fact you think it’s a load of poppycock and you can’t be bothered. Which is why she’s in church EVERY Sunday.

Yes, it’s hypocritical. But there’s no way she’s going to tell her mother that her child has let her down. Again. No one wants to be that kid. You’re stupid, AND you’re STILL not listening to your mother about pertinent life stuff. And so, Facada Continua.

I’m not actually sure that’s the Latin word for facade. Feel free to quote me anyway. No. No, don’t.

tSN