Writing that title makes me think of 2 things. First,what is the plural of Mercedes,written? I mean really. And second,remember that episode of Fresh Prince of Bel Air when Carlton,bless his soul,has a fiancee called Mercedes? Priceless. Iiin West Philadelphia,born and raised…

I’m not the biggest fan of weddings,marriages,pre-nuptial agreements ngurarios(sp?)/ayies and/or receptions. Practically the only part of any wedding I’m slightly inclined to is the thought of getting hitched in Las Vegas with a poorly done yet amusing impersonation of Elvis as my officiating priest. Other than that…zilch. )More on that in another post.) So when my cousin decided I should be in his lineup,my cold feet were comparable only to if I was getting married myself. However,in a brief and what turned out to be fatal moment of insanity,I was convinced to be a bridesmaid.

During my lunch with Mr. M,I told him of my bridezilla woes. He laughed indulgently and told me gently to strap on a pair. I pouted until he said, “Can I come?”

In case you were wondering,OF COURSE THERE WAS HESITATION!! That’s not a very FWB gesture,is it? And if it’s not,then what does it mean? What the hell was Mr. M. trying to say? And did I really want him to see me swathed in layers of pink? (They claimed it was fuschia. Ha.)

“No.”
“Why?”
“Because I’ll be in the lineup. You’ll barely see me.”
“I’ll bring Roger.”
“And make him sit through a wedding ceremony? For heaven’s sake!”
“I want to come.”
“Well,I don’t want you to.”
“Where is it?”
“I don’t know and/or I’m not telling you.”
“I’ll just call your cousin and find out.” Crap. This situation was rapidly deteriorating,and not in my favor. Why the hell was he so bent on this wedding?